What a pain

The other night I was on the computer and all of a sudden the screen locked up and the sound looped. Having been around a while with computers I know its either faulty software or a hardware glitch. This time we opt for the hardware. Damn it. Seems now that I can't boot up into Windows Pro XP, there is an apparently missing critical file. Luckily I have a dual boot set up so I can still use the computer and salvage my files. Some things that would be very very difficult (i.e. impossible) to replace is my email. I just moved the Outlook data file that holds all of my sent/received email and contacts. 2.2 GB file. Yeah I kept a few files. You see I'm on a technical network that has over 1000 members where we talk about new things, help each other with the problem at hand and warn each other of possible scams or traps. Then there is the 'bs' group where we joke, talk about non technical things, and basically have become a rather close group, sharing in each others pain and joys. Certainly more of the former than the later lately

So far in the past 6 months we've had one friend nearly die from a liver complication and ended up getting a transplant. Another friend loose their mother, one lost a father, a son in law, one was diagnosed with a disease that will one day leave him with limited movement and speech, and another his life from bone cancer. We've been short on good news for '06. But that's life sometimes, there's good and bad and there's nothing fair about it. Fairness is a concept invented by people in a vain attempt to resolve disputes between kids, hopefully before they start. What life brings us is balance. Its about change and how those changes balance out. My group of friends share a great deal with each other, I sometimes do but yet I felt I've placed that burden on them once before and I've not 'earned' that right to do so again. About 4 years ago we nearly lost our youngest child to HIB, a strain of influenza that caused pneumonia, which caused fluid buildup around his heart and nearly killed him. We spent 2 weeks in the hospital, riding an emotional roller coaster of pain and relief. One day I'll talk about that story, but not this day. What Lanae and I ended up doing as a form of stress relief was to turn to this group of friends on the Internet and pour all our emotions into our letters to the group. Just talking was so much help and seeing their heartfelt responses did as well. It really means a lot when you can see that someone understands what you're going through.

And sometimes that's what I'll do here, hopefully never anything traumatic as a sick child or lost family member. I know its very possible, after all life is not fair. But we can hope for the best.

Well my backups are about finished so I'm going to cut this off here and go fight windows.